Excuses, Etc.

So everyone knows that I work out regularly enough, and that there are a lot of roadblocks that annoy me and stop me from going more often and being more active.

What I talk about primarily is my foot/ankle/hip problems. Y’all get it; that stuff sucks. But I’m medicated and it’s manageable now as long as I take my pills and do my stretches. I just can’t go overboard. I’ve increased the ROM by 15% 🙂 

What I want to complain about now is the rut I’m in. Call it depression, or laziness, or working 2 jobs and going to school full time, or whatever. But it’s so difficult to convince myself to go to the gym. I don’t mind working out at home. I have like a bajillion dumbbells and those ball things. I have exercise mats and a jump rope and resistance bands and some other stuff. 

But all I can really manage to do at the gym is cardio. I can’t even blame the meatheads, because I don’t care about them and making fun of them in my head gives me strength. So it’s possible that I can do my strength training primarily at home and my cardio primarily at the gym… It’s just difficult to plan/manage. When I get home all I want to do is consume substances that make me forget I’m alive with responsibilities.

Also I hate being such a scaredy cat because there’s a huge, PERFECTLY good trail RIGHT DOWN THE STREET that I never use because people are horrible and terrifying. I have a bike, I like to run, i could even walk, but NO. Fear runs my life because everything is terrible and bad things can happen to anyone and I have a cat to take care of. 

So I depend on the gym. It’s scary in its own way. People look at you in the gym. Some will try to convince me that everyone is busy doing their own thing, but that’s not always true. 

Since I’ve gotten fat again I only have sweatpants and a few tshirts/hoodies that I can wear because all my cute workout stuff is too small. So I’m the frumpy nobody who looks like I’ve never been to a gym before. Not to mention once I’ve started actually working out. Then my hair is stupid and my face is stupid and people i know go to the gym!

I don’t want people i know there!

Last time i was able to drop 30 pounds (my weight has fluctuated a lot in 15 years which is about normal, i think) we had a treadmill in our basement, which was 20 feet away from my bed. EZPZ. Then running outside was fun, because at that point i lived in a more-flat neighborhood.

This post is just me whining about how ‘hard’ it is for me to go do exercises i enjoy doing.

Also the tennis courts by our house are always taken over, and when we wait there patiently they dont’ seem to care and just keep on tennis-ing forever until we decide to leave. Plus i can only get like 2 people to play tennis with me.

~this was a post~


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