Once upon a time I used to invite people to go with me to an Old Chicago far far away at least three times a week. Soon, it became a weekly deal that would be known as “OC Monday.” Sometimes we still go more than once a week. We play pool, other games, drink drinks, and eat food. We all lived happily ever after.
Starting midway last year I started the World Beer Tour and because of my lightweightedness I need to go quite often to complete the mini tours and get the prizes I look forward to. I don’t much like going places alone, so after work I would normally invite a coworker or two, or just the fiance, to go with me. We started going so often that in December I decided to make it a weekly thing. January 7 was the first official OC Monday!
Now, we all know I have some anxiety issues (“some” being used to lighten the issue). This is part of the reason why I always invited a couple friends or Matt. Part of my anxiety stems from a deep-seeded hatred for myself (sad but true), so I get very sensitive when it comes to my weekly fun time. I take it very personally for some reason. A few weeks ago I thought for sure no one was coming because my brain told me nobody wanted to because they were making plans without me and didn’t want me to do those instead. More people just ended up being late and it wasn’t a big deal anymore.
This post is short and sweet because I’m getting ready to go to the restaurant right now and I’m nervous my friends will get bored of going with me, and overall I’m afraid that sometimes my brain issues get in the way of stronger friendships. I often turn down invitations or decide not to follow through with get togethers and things. Actually, I know the anxiety and the self esteem issues in general get in the way of relationships along with other things. I don’t know what I’m really trying to say.
Maybe I just want to make the best of what I can handle? I don’t like to go “clubbing.” Dancing isn’t really my forte, and I’m too shy to speak up when the bartender keeps skipping me, and most of the plans my friends make regarding clubs are short-notice. I like having my weekly get together. It’s planned, it’s fun, it’s safe…
Anyway happy Monday even though this will be posted on Tuesday!
By the way, I give Old Chicago Oakview a 10/10 for happy fun time, our faithful server Jenny 10/10 for awesome, and beer a bajillion out of whatever.